A Harrowing Life of Taxis

One of the greatest perks of my job is that I can take taxis to all my assignments. I've become so accustomed to the lifestyle that I'm unable to take public transport EVEN when it's not paid for.

Anywayz, it isn't all sunshine and roses while taking cabs, ok?

I have to put up with drivers who talk at the top of their voices, drivers who drive as if they are on the F1 race track (this I secretly like), drivers who play techno music at full volume, and of course, mutha-fucking drivers who go in circles and cheat my money.

Of all the cabs that I've taken (and that's plenty, mind you), I have to say that Silvercab drivers are the worst offenders.

They take you round and round in circles, purposely drive slowly, and go a much longer way than needed. Bloody bastards.

Just the other day, I received a life lesson from my senior reporter, S.

I was going to Suntec after work and gave him a lift. When we hopped into a Silvercab, he asked which way he should take. We told him to take the fastest route.

Well, I dunno which driving school he went to but MAKING A BIG ROUND DOES NOT CONSTITUTE THE FASTEST ROUTE.

The asshole made a huuuuggeeee ass loop, and my heart leaped every time the metre jumped 20 cents.

That's when S casually asked the driver if he knew where the hell he was going, and if the route he was taking was truly the shortest and fastest way.

After a pregnant pause, the driver started muttering a whole bunch of rubbish like "you told me to choose which route..." blah blah blah.

S silenced him and quietly took him to task, all the while smiling and never raising his voice.

Amazing. I need to learn his finesse. Anyhoo, we arrived at Suntec, the driver told me to pay whatever I wanted. The fare was $13, and when I offered $11, he took $10 and used his fucking ELBOW to shrug away my $1.

Bastard! I give you money and you shoo me away like some insect!

Anywayz, I try to put S' actions into practice but I must say I lack the guts and finesse. Most of the time I end up slightly yelling at the taxi driver, or quietly shaking my head and making disapproving noises when I'm too chicken to voice disapproval.

Hmmm, style needs work.

All I'm saying is, watch out for those Silvercabs, and the Premier version as well.

Cheats. Or just bloody fools who dunno how to drive. So either way. Keep clear.