An Uncontrollable Rage

Seriously, I need to start controlling my crazy temper and violent nature, before someone gets hurt. Badly.

At work, I'm super high strung and can fly into an uncontrollable rage in a moment. Just like that, without warning, I literally see red and want to draw blood.

Exhibit A:

a few months back, just before I left for Japan, my boss decided to pile on the work. Coupled with the articles I had to write from my Cologne trip, I was stretched to the limit.

At my breaking point, my colleague, let's call this person Z, saw that I was doing a phone interview. So Z saunters over to my terminal, and casually says, "Wah, so serious ah?"

I chose to ignore this person and continued with my work. Not satisfied with my silence, she picked up a notebook and tossed it at me, hitting my shoulder.

That's when I went into Hulk mode and turned into a raging bull. I picked up the notebook, and FLUNG IT HARD at Z, hitting Z in the stomach.

Not happy, I even yelled at her and told her off for being childish and annoying and always picking the wrong moment to irritate people.

Yeah, that's what I did. In the office. With all my colleagues in full view.

Exhibit B:

Two days ago, my boss came over because he wanted to clarify my use of "percentage point", as opposed to "percent".

Turns out, I got it wrong, and he explained it again.

Suddenly, this other colleague, whom we'd call X, chimed up and started saying very loudly, "Wah! I thought Joanne was from a business school! Like that also dunno ah!"

This came just five minutes after X was insulting me and calling me short cos X was bored, not doing any work, and annoyingly rude.

So anyway, back to the percentage point bit. My boss and I ignored X the first time. Not happy, X repeated it several times.

Really pissed off now, I snapped, "And which school did you graduate from, the BITCH school?"

Hearing this, my boss raised his hands, said he didn't want to get involved, and scooted to the other side of the room.

I know, I know, I'm very unprofessional. And there were a million other retorts, less violent, less crude, that I could have come up with. But at that very moment, I just wanted X to shut up so badly, I was REALLY annoyed with X's holier than thou attitude, that I wanted to say something equivalent to slashing X with a literary knife.

I think I've a very violent nature. Volleyball used to be my therapy for working out my anger issues. But now, I'm left with nothing.

Sigh, yoga anyone?

And as a side note, X, Z and I are usually good friends. Haha, or so I thought. Dunno lah! How friendly does one get with one's colleagues anyway?